Wednesday, January 28, 2009

contemptuous demeanour

My last post was a terrible disaster..i fumbled..bumbled..n i mucked up with my post..but i am overwhelmed with the comments i received despite of such blunders.
Thank you all for your support..n i will try to improve,as there are some well wishers who always guide me n point out the mistakes i commit,so that i could rectify them in future..love u all..
moving on..
About a week ago i came across one of the various turpitude of modern society,an incident a highly disgraceful one..
As i was entering a food joint with a friend of mine,we discovered that a bunch of guys being dragged out by the security guards..on inquiring about the incident we found out that those guys (dressed neatly and seemed to belong from a good family) were caught taking pics of girls present there n were passing lewd comments..
when a couple raised an objection to it the security guards came into action..n those reprobates were kicked out.
Often,girls are considered to be a soft target..tender,delicate,sophisticated and sensitive are some far-famed words to describe the fairer sex..but do not misconstrue us,with such predefined words because when time demands we can even be bold,strong,audacious and assertive..
Just because of few such creatures the whole of the male community is doubted n looked down on by girls..it becomes harder for us to trust the same..
The degree of obscenity sometimes exceeds the limit,quite expected from the illiterates..but when attempted by guys hailing from a literate background..it seems unbelievable!
God has created two species in human kind..so they both have liberty to access n lead their life their way,but the fairer sex can not do so because time n again they are targeted by such indecent acts..
I have come across few girls who lock themselves up in their abode,because they are afraid of such incidents..n they are preoccupied with notions that the same would happen to them,yes it can happen to them or to any1..but shutting yourself is not the option..this may lead such creatures to sit on your head n will motivate them to go ahead n continue there obscenity..if u really want to teach them a lesson then move out of your shadow n show them that you r not weak..u have the courage to face them n give them the desired answer as and when required..
"Courage is not the absence of fear. It is going forward with the face of fear."
Washing girls foot in navaratra,n making them an object of worship is not what is needed..i am not against these rituals,but what i feel is Women need to be respected,and guys who don't respect women,are like cold blooded animals..
You may find a group of guys hanging around in pubs,restaurants at late night..but if u find a girl she would be accompanied by her guy,family,or in group along with her male counterparts..u will rarely find a group of girls hanging out so late,reason there are drunkards and lustful eyes all over looking for their prey,peeping from behind the poles,in the corridors,on the streets,on bikes or maybe in luxurious cars..
No one can be there to escort u all the time..its u who has to protect yourself,from the devils and from the evils.
so don't hide from such incidents..if it happened to a girl next to u it can happen to u too..Preparing yourself is better than repenting later..
I wish this world could be a safer place to live so that a mother sitting miles away from her daughter does not have to fear for her daughter to return back from work safely..
I am not of an anti-male opinion..because i know all the guys are not the same,some are better,some are good,and some are the best..
but the leftover are "awful"..so,not only girls but even guys need to beware of such awful creatures because they are not only ruining us but they are also ruining your whole community..
"Life on the planet is born of woman".so,respect them n give them there due credit.

33 comments:

Ria said...

very well written babe!and i second ur thoughts in this post. I hate it when such things act as deterrents in our life.

sawan said...

:) maybe we think alike cos my post echoes your words.

Trinaa said...

boys!! *puke*

n as 4 u..u always write nice posts..so chill maadi jaanu :)

Toonfactory said...

Well written..and such boys should be kicked by the gals first before kicking them out...

swati said...

@ria
tanx babes..

swati said...

@ sawan
ys i read ur post n i agree our thoughts are vry mch alike..

swati said...

@ trina
tanx sweety...:)

swati said...

@toonfactory
tanx dear..n they are kickd many-a-times bt still they continue doing sch things.."a dog's tail can never be set straight".

Hemanth Potluri said...

:)...nice post swati :)..

urs..hemu..

Mannu said...

Nice post. May i take the oppertunity through your post, to explain some finer points i have been contemplating for past some days.Infact, i am just planning to write to blog about the problem that women are to their own kind and to the development and changes in our society, very soon.
On the matter of equality, women folk should begin to agree and accept that by nature's design, averagly the Male sex is physically stronger than them. and in them of emotional retraints also, the male of species is stronger one. So, any time the women demand for equality, try not to flout what the nature has designed. i have heard of physical molestation beign done by woman; women getting as much, or more, depraved than men are. they swear all those mom-sis abuses that only the men do.Being free should not be meant out as freedom to go to pubs, not being given lewd remarks on wearing a provocative dress, doing hot PDAs in public and cinema halls,..
Woman need to re-define what Equality against men mean to them. Ofcourse women should not try to pass water standing out in the open fields.
They MUST accept that nearly all men, educated or illiterate, are sensitive and lusty for women body and their inside sights.
The case you mention, going by your accounts, definitly stands in the favour of women folk.

Toonfactory said...

Swati kahaan gayab ho???No new post for a long time...whats keepin ya busy gal?

Alok said...

You might see Mannu's comment as a "typical male" comment and "caveman"-ish or "not modern," but let me elaborate on it:

You are a female human being. You are Designed to be attractive to male eyes.

Consider your own reaction when you see a flower in full bloom. Don't you want to keep staring at its beauty?

The flower is designed to look beautiful and attractive, so that bees and insects might get attracted and come near and pollinate it.

A female is like a flower to a male. He cannot help but appreciate its beauty. Every male feels this; their reaction to it varies.

Some grow afraid of it. They try to suppress it because they've been told "it's bad (as your post is saying)". This fear extends from "fear of the reaction to seeing a girl" to "fear of seeing a girl". These guys soon start avoiding Girls, unhealthily suppressing their instincts.

Some must exclaim about it. So either they make a comment to their friend, or speak that comment out loud to the girl. They might be showing otherwise, but they are at the base again afraid of this feeling.

The rest of the males go ahead and approach the girl.


I think this is an appropriate place to answer the question you asked me: "What is an Ego?"

The answer is simple: An Ego is to be proud of your self, of what you ARE: a human being.

Having an Ego means not caring about what others are saying about you. Even if they are passing lewd comments about you. If you had an ego, you'd be proud of what you ARE rather than what others are calling you.

It is common human practice to be afraid of oneself, of our own glory. That is the reason why they tell you to not be proud of yourself: because they are afraid of what you might become once you start appreciating yourself and build yourself to your glory.

At the same time, having a false belief of one's self is not having an Ego. In fact, that is the exact opposite of an Ego.


A final point: Freedom is the most valuable thing a human being possesses. Anyone that is PHYSICALLY restricting you from your will is committing the most serious crime. You have every right to retaliate as you want and however you want to protect your freedom. Keep a means to protect yourself near you.

But remember, DO NOT be ashamed of yourself.

swati said...

@hemz
tanx hemu

swati said...

@mannu
thanx for the comment mannu...
but i would like to clarify few points which may be i missed out in my post
agree that men are physically stronger but on the emotional backdrop women stands way ahead
then men..
freedom im talking about is not only about going to pubs, n using abusive language..it includes the liberty of working n travelling over nights
women do go for night shifts,they may not express but they are apprehensive n are always alert about the aftermath..
if a girl wears a provoking dress she has to face the consequences no doubt,but looking at the broader aspect in more then quarter of the cases girls covered from head to toe are targeted coz they are considered as soft n weaker targets ..

the basic problem is that men cnt see the fairer sex working with as much liberty n ease as they work
so they have found an alternative to harass them n break their moral by physically abusing them

women is a beautiful creation of god, a women has to live with the physical structure she has been blessed with she cant change it..
but men too have been blessed with brain n will power(a major difference b/w a human being and an animal)..so i feel they need to behave in a dignified way..
men n women are two different species they cant be judged on similar parameters..in some ways men are ahead
n women dose not shy off in admitting it but men does shy off in admitting that in some manner women are superior
to them..
once actions is under his control and he should take care that it shouldn't harm others..

swati said...

@toon
hey nothing in mind these days..:(

swati said...

@alok
hey alok thanks for visiting.. :)
every one has full right to express their views..n yes every individual has a different take
on each issue so is the case with me..
appreciation is highly acknowledged by women but sometimes this appreciation gets molded in a bitter form,
i have already stated in my post that i don't think that all the guys are same but few
of them are polluting the community..coz they don't know the difference b/w appreciation and molestation

n i find sme folk pass comments just for pleasure,has nothing to do with their feelings it becomes a hobby for them..
suppressing n expressing one's feeling is up to oneself.
if one can't express it in a tender way than its better to suppress it rather than going wild,
assaulting, n torturing the other person.

i really liked the way u compared a girl with a flower..i mean any girl would like it..
this is wat a girl expect..from guys..displaying a bit of respect towards women wont let
men down..

coming on to EGO i have one more question how to differentiate b/w ego n a false ego..u explained wats a false ego..bt how does one differentiate b/w the two..
an ego is many a times taken as ur overconfidence,a celebration of ur success involve others
as well n they at some point take it to be as ur overconfidence..n if u meet anothr person
of ur stature n thoughts then this so called "EGO clash" comes into action...

Mannu said...

@Alok,
Ha ha..! those cognates! "cave Man"ish! to refer about me! nice humor.
Alok, Thanks a lot for refining and qualitatively putting across whatever even i was intending to say. I guess i was a little too crude.
Maybe my kind of description would have launched the matter into the orbit of Mars-Venus debate, which i didnt desire anyway.U balanced it away, brining about good harmony between the genders.

Alok said...

Swati,

The whole point of my comment was: It doesn't matter how men are treating you. Whatever the reason for their behaviour may be, you should not be affected by it.

You will automatically know when the guy is appreciating you for what you Are (i.e., respecting you). It doesn't matter what the guy is showing you. (For that case, the guy may be showing respect to you even when he disrespects you internally)


And well about Ego:

Ego is knowing what one is, and what one is capable of. When you perceive (rather than judge) yourself, you will see what you ARE.

On the other hand, calling yourself something that you are not (and refusing to see that you aren't that, so that you can change yourself) is having a false ego.

Mannu said...

@Swati,
just a caveat before i say any further-- please dont judge me to be any such men who pass lewd comments, neither supporting their acts in any form. All i want is to help build understanding between genders.
So, like woman, including yourself, have appreciated men's brains, men, including Alok and myself, have never hesitated appreciating women's beauty and x-appeal.
At your response that on the matter of emotional strength, woman are stronger, all i meant was that men show greater restraints in pouring out emotions. In other words, they are more cruel than woman in hurling physical abuses, attacking, or being brutal. Definitely, in return, women have been bestwoed with stronger emotional strength, as u were saying- meaning- ability to tolerate, be pateint, manage and handle stress/anger, and all.
If u analyse these two qualities descibed above between the genders, maybe, you and I can better explain the cause of this sense of insecurity among modern Indian women who are urbanised. See, in India, men's population being higher than women, proportion of Urbanised thinking men is smaller than gowdy men. results are obvious, which you express as- 'not all men are liscentious'.I have no proper statistics to say how many women victims were covered enough not to deserve assaults be men, although i have heard it from new reports as well. But those reports have failed to diagnose - how much provocation men need to carry out an assault, how much and how many women should expose to induce men to make an advance to any member of the female species; how much is the x-ual tolerance of men, w.r.t. to women, etc.
So while you keep the pressure going on men to evolve more into urbansied living, please mind to keep your guards pressed at all times.
BTW more vulgar activites are happening between men and women in the name of working together than by way of sexual assault from roadside perverts. More attention is needed at that front.

swati said...

@alok
i was just speaking in general aspect as this is wat we observe in our day to day life..girls are habitual to such repugnant behavior..n they generally avoid and ignore it..
and as far as being affected is concerned well it depends on the mental strength of a girl..some gets affected easily some don't..

i guess now i know better what an ego is..thanks to u..:)

swati said...

@mannu
hey not at all..i believe tat neither u nor alok wud have ever committed such an act,and neither will u do it in future..n i truly believe tat u do respect women..and what forces me to think so is maybe ur literacy n ur idiosyncrasy..
contradicting ur later comment i dnt feel that nearly ALL men are to that extent lusty.. some of them are..
n i would like to say it again that my post wasn't gender biased nor am i..I was talking in general about a FEW folks who spoil male community..it had nothing to with an individual..
without drifting away more from my posts agenda..
i would like to conclude by saying that neither a male or a female can singly rule or govern the world..they act as a driving force for each other..so they need to maintain the harmony..
n yes there are many other matters besides this,which need to be dealt stringently..

BIG Omi said...

well i agree to Swati !! Everyone has got in to incidences where the fairer sex is abused both physically, verbally and mentally by the stronger sex. and hen we pass comment in favor of later ones we should keep in mind that our closed ones include the humans from fairer sex, just a thought of abusement to whom can make you rage in fury.

I hope i made my point clear ???

swati said...

@omi
yes u did make ur point clear omi..
a mere of thought causes a fury,so think wat girls have to go thru wen they actually encounter such obscenity..
n thanx for visiting..

Karthik said...

Nice post.. cud see the missing link betwwen this and the previous ne :P I luv the tile (Like u always say n ma blog but nt ma posts ehmm?? :( ) Jus kidding mate!!

Karthik said...

Its been mindslapping posts frm you.. could i expect a complete humor post next?? Its a request frm ur fan jee!!!

swati said...

@karthik
a "humorous" post is that wat i read in ur comment..
i dnt like turning down the request..will definitely try..bt u know wat im too bad at it..n i will again fumble like i did in my previous post..
but will definitely try dear..after all its a request n that too from a "FAN"..lol
:)

Scribblers Inc said...

good thoughts written pretty well...one little thought though...are words like turpitude and other heavier ones really necessary?just a thought! :)

Scribblers Inc.

-=A.R.N.=- said...

First time visitor to your blog...so I didn't wanna start off on a bad note, but Mannu and Alok are kinda right.
(Or maybe its just me coz I'm also a guy)

In any case, we can't accept the degradation of women...on BOTH ends...whether its the harassment of women by men or when they they degrade themselves by projecting themselves as worth nothing more than an object of desire as depicted on FTV.

Karthik said...

When s the next post??

Mannu said...

Subject: Gratitude comment to comments on my blog.

Swati,
Your comments to my blog are very warmly welcomed. I accept that this one is based on a very limited observations i have made- and that too in the life of my own near and dear ones.Modern women surly have lots of positive things about them, which has not been touched at all.
Perhaps, this post may serve in highlighting what ever is wrong in them, in the process getting some of them , like yourself who are humble, to pay some heed and work towards further improvements.
Even if it is rejected by most people, the small few who read it may act and react. I would find my happiness in (1)_expressing my strong opinions across and (2)_finding comments however infinitely small.

Regarding that "taali sirf ..." comment, Ma'am, just yesterday i was reading something about the Tout Law. Do some googling and wikipedia search on that. U will enjoy it, i guess.!

Saurabh said...

very nice post, i myself had been worried about these issues a few days back, being a brother and a son, it is sad to see that most men, and also some women (which is all the more shocking) consider women as a sub-standard species, not deserving any rights. it is only when women are respected in society, that we can really consider it to be truly prosperous. i hate the fact that people in india are either "worshipping" women during festivals, or "abusing" them, why can't they simply respect them as normal people and give them their rights and privilges in society...

swati said...

@saurabh
i completely agree with u on this fact saurabh..

Chronicwriter said...

:)

a whole life in a single post.. lovely.. love ma mom so much now.. as always..


www.chronicwriter.com
hop down for some funny read.. the current post is an emotional attempt in literature though

About 'New Horizon'

It beats, it pumps, it lives, it listens, it feels, it weeps, it speaks,it screams.... it does whatever i feel... Just trying out here what my heart conveys.

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