Let them grow!!

From vacuous expressions,to lit up eyes

From earthy wishes to sky-high fives

From silent classes to chaotic bunch

From dearthy lunch to unpleasant crunch

From a noisy slum to a tranquil show

I have seen them grow

From child labour,to mute screams,

From scars unhealed,to strangled dreams

From tiny feet and burdened physique

I hope to see them grow

From childlike desires to aspirations gone by

From smoke in a dhaba to castles in the sky

From moments spent in vain and tears collected

I think they have grown

From despaired eyes to half held hands

From unsheltered roofs to ragged pants

From caliber hung to song unsung

I see them grow

From a to zee to nursery rhymes

From witty proposals to charming chimes

From talents loaned to skills finally honed

I see they have grown

From a lame student to being a mentor

From a gloomy silence to cheerful fervor

From blocked mind to outstreched arms

I have seen me grow

From a star lost in a night

From a bird frozen in mid-flight

From the horizon sailing out of sight

From a torch searching for some light

There is a lot in them to grow,

So please help them grow.

The theme of this post is not mine but the thoughts and words are completely mine.

And this post is dedicated to the underprivileged children i teach for an NGO.

An Ethereal Spirit

One night I heard a knock at my door

Who could it be I wasn’t so sure.

I opened the door and was filled with glee

The visitors ahead were no strangers to me.

I welcomed the guests with a fake smile

For I knew- might not I get any respite.

An air of suspicion crammed the space

My home was now a mysterious place.

Have you any clue who these visitors were?

My long lost desires- all who refused to blur

Travelled they long- from dawn to dusk

At last were here to brush off my mind laden with dust

Some desires filled me with great zest

For I knew they may soon manifest.

Some were buried deep in my heart

Since I nipped them in bud with a feeble dart.

For some desires I had, my heart still repents

Why I had them ever, I forever lament.

Some had grown in layers manifold

They cry in silence while I suffer and behold.

Died the few- their painful death

Left were only the memories and wreckage.

Some bygone desires resurfaced and floated in the heart

I smiled morbidly as I knew they soon will depart

Ready To Depart When they were,night turned into ethreal hours

I wrapped them in celstial coffin,on top of that sprinkled some flowers

Again they promised to visit my heart,when i refused to make them my integral part

In vain they pleaded on their knees,but it was time for them to rest in graveyard.

p.s. i am highly thankful to preety(tweenu) for designing this beautiful template for my blog,though it is still under construction,but i know she will modify n make it exactly as i want it to be :) Love ya tweeny :)

Words-eternally yours

I thought for the whole day,to see what all can i write..

A lil smthng tat would say just what was on my mind.

However there was not a single thought..

That captured my psyche..

For no one else would understand wat i'd like to write.

My hands itched to scribble ;

And then i felt what world would be without words..

Few dots dashes n few unfinished pictures.

I closed my eyes n what i see is beauty n rain..

And if there are no words thn hw will u express pain.

For a single word can paint thousand pictures..

When manipulated n shuffled these words tend to nurture.

When spoken in darkness they spread their own light..

Forms a canopy when thrown in searing sunshine.

Words here words there,words unspoken words unsaid..

Words of lose words of win,words of wisdom words of sin.

Without words will u be able to curse?

Without words how will u flirt.

Words stretch their arms when u want to cry..

They transforms into a melodious song to make you fly high.

Loving words,hating words..

Embracing words,deserting words.

In my mind words tremble..

Coz while words are mighty useful thy are also vry beautfl.

As i rest my pen on the paper whch was blank few minutes ago..

And look at the hands whch had an urge to type..

I see some alphabetic carvings in form of words..

Fulfilling my desire to write.

An aura of silver night

Cuddling my arms around my knees

I sat on the beach of an unanamed sea

Resting my chin on the joints..

Canvassing the silver night

Moonlight was shining bright,

Spreading a silvery light reflecting in the water,

The hush n rush of the swiftly flowing silver liquid

Transmuting ordianry water into mercuric metallic flow

Watching waves wash up the beach and washing out again

Taking away the sand beneath my feet.

In the sky

Moonlight romancing wid billions of stars

Spreading the silver luminance

Two brightly shining silver star

Spreading thr silver smile

Seemed to perform an angelic dance

Showering happiness n blessings

The clouds were broken wid silver rays

Covering the moon now n then

When clouds parted

The beauty of the night sky was made to appear

There was subdued heavy silence

Some dark feelings overshadowed me

Sudden gush of being drenched in dark silver flow

To wipe of the fear,tears,and the past grudges

To rejuvenate self,n be a new born

And then thr was beautfl silver rain pouring frm sky

Gazing my past,

The droplets falling on the fallen petals n leaves

That silver rain marked a new beginning

And filled life wid acoustic silver paint

I still sat drenched wid cuddled arms

Watching the new horizon

Witnessing the silver lining of clouds

Transforming into a golden ray.

It has been a year since i have been into blogging and my pace has been really slow bt i love it this way,

so here's a Big heartfelt thankyou on my 25th(silver) post to all my frenz who have been really supportive throughout n to all those too who came here read the post but didnt comment THANK YOU ALL..

:) :)

Wishes from my heart

This post is a dedication to my frst blogger fren HEMANTH..he was the frst one to hop to my blog n comment..so he ought to be special..n since he is going to tie the knots very soon so here are some lines straight frm my heart for him :P

Innocence is his jack
He is a masters of purity
Brighter then sunshine
Soothing as moonlight
Full of naughtiness
n oozes wid enthu
He is a full hatta katta gabru :P
Has millions of wellwishers
N always ready to absorb others tears
He is a Tall Dark Handsome hunk
Getting hooked in less thn a month..

Happiness is walking in his life with slow steady steps
He'll be tying the nuptial knot in stary stary nights

Wishing u a very very very happy married life dear..
hope we'll be frenz frever :)
Am i invited??? :) :)
p.s. my next post will be my 25th one..so it will all be full of silver color..

Phantom of memories

 

  He comes to you when you don't want him

  He whispers he touches u like a cold zephyr

  He is not dark not light,he is not death not life..

  He is filled with love..n fantasy..

  He is full of grief..n grudges..

  His romance is unlike anyother..

  His kiss is everlasting ,soft n tender.

  You long for him,want his presence..

  You hug him,embrace him n make him sense.

  You ask him to come,to be close,to make you happy..

  You yell at him,thrash him when ur unhappy .

  You hear his whispers,somwhr dowm ur mind..

  But he sounds nothing,n his rustles disappear wid wind.

  He is not a man ,nor a beast..

  He is not a saint,nor a feast.

  Then guess who he is? guess who??

  He remains with you till eternity

  n he is no one else thn your own PHANTOM OF MEMORIES

to read the hindi version of my post in tweenies own words plz click here dhundhla aks..a beautiful composition.

Missing You

You were on my mind when i woke up this morning remembering your smile i guess the next time i'll see your face will take a little while i was remembering your arms around me love the way they always feel warm with you by my side  i completely feel no harm i was remembering your voice makes my heart skip a beat but without you baby my whole body's weak i was remembering our times the good and the bad the funny times when you cheered me up  and especially the sad remembering your eyes how they always meet mine remembering all the little things you do  to make my life worthwhile i was wondering when we'll be together  just us few i guess i'm missing you more than i usually do This post is dedicated to all my cousins who left back n brthr who cudnt make it for the family function..n also to few of my blogger frenz who are far away and few who r missing frm blogosphere:)

An angel in disguise

Im glad to inform that the else part which was under construction has been successfully completed
if

{
those who missed out or forgot the if part may click here to catch up with it else theCondition will be incomplete
}
else
{

Blessing from god,in the form of an angelic figure..
Figure which makes family complete and causes ur energy to trigger.

The chan-chan of the anklet,from those tiny feets..
Those lovely dresses and the spell binding speech.

The barbie dolls and the kitchen sets.
Those pony tails and the care for the pets.

Fights with sibling simply as a routine..
Giving a reason he/she used my pantene.

Folded sleeves and skirts getting shorter..
Topping the class and proving self smarter.

Nail colors,lipsticks and the mascaras

Tomboyish,boisterous and voo maara..


Shopping,bargaining and the 1rs.fight
Jwellery,gossips and the envy sights

Tolerating wild stares,taunts and obscenity
Giving slaps,sandals and maintaining dignity

Little concerns gives her tears..
N those strong shoulders,to hide ur fears.

Those struggles,and the fight for equality..
Lots of patience and 1000's of qualities

First crush,first love,first kiss..
The first last crush,the first last love,the first last kiss.

Loosing the loved one,wat an irony.
Shedding tears its her tyranny

Dillema to accept or reject a proposal,
Lots of thoughts for not hurting an individual.


Garlands,marriage n the stomach butterflies..
Strange feeling on entering new life.

Pearl in eyes for parting with parents..
Maintaining firmly the delicate relations.

Warmth of being in honey's arms..
Cooking delicacies to make him charm.

The surreal beautiful moonlight night..
On the beach and hubbies starlight eyes.

Waiting anxiously for betterhalfes return..
Giving the good news..n getting a tight hug in refund.

Homemaker,working or super model..
managing each role with equal moral.

Love,affection,care..
These are the synonyms of her.
}


Wishing all you mothers a happy mother's day..n always remember that
"A son is a son till he gets his wife,a daughter is a daughter till the end of life."
*wink *wink :)

TEARS-an autobiography

I visit u very often..
causing choked throats n your voice softens.

No one was there to stop me from reaching ur beautiful eyes..
But wait there was more,something more than ur empty eyes.

But just what it was i could not tell..
And yet, I sensed that all was not well.

My spirit was troubled n i felt to shout..
Too long i have been captive,please let me out!.

There in the darkness I struggled to see..
Trying to grasp what was stopping me.

I told to myself that i am tough and strong..
But a voice spoke softly tat's where ur wrong.

"You tell yourself, 'I can handle it all..
'No matter what happens, I must stand tall.'

"Let go of your pride and admit that you cry..
Coz i am the witness so dont u ever shy.

Just shut your eyes tightly n let me fall down..
I'll roll down your cheeks,n make you calm n sound.

I know that no longer would I be the same,as u weep..
I'll come and go but then there will be peace.

So dont hesitate to call me again..
Coz i'll find my way even if there is no rain.

I'll come running to fill your eyes for years...
N people will say tat u have eyes full of TEARS.

Journey of a boy..

if (baby==boy)
{
First glimpse of god's ultimate creation,
the sensation of own blood,n bowing head in admiration..

The sweet smile..n pearly eyes,
those soft nails,and tightly clutched fives..

The finger and the sign languages,
mum for water and those giggles driving u to seat edges..

Crawling in mud,n catching small insects,
holding a pen n scribbling,with grandpa's specs..

Uttering the first word..n taking the first step,
falling down and stretching arms in distress..

Pulling up the pants..n wiping nose with shirts cuff,
hitting a six and making a buzz..

School days..the happy ways,
the basketball court n heated debates..

Oily hairs replaced with zataks and brylcream,
tying tie low n getting in mainstream..

Guitar strings..n hang outs in ccd's,
those endless chats..n falunting bikes in morning breeze..

The peculiar flirting,as if gals don't understand,
the gifts n chocolates and those spontaneous errands..

The farewell,the music n the attractive sherwaani.
swanking the suit as if its Armaani..

The struggles..and long walks on pavement
watching the dreams go real causing the upliftment..

Selection in best college,
those fest,fiesta's n endless knowledge..

Shivers on arrival of companies for placement,
those tears,celebrations and in within arguments..

The thumping of heart on first serious proposal,
those sleepless nights and getting emotional..

The reddening n blushing,on proposals consent,
a feeling of pride on being independent..

The work stress,the deadlines, n those random journeys,
the dearth of sleep,n visiting the refineries..

Dedicating the first salary check to parents,
more blessings and graces from the heaven..

The engagement,the rituals,
those late night calls,and the nuptials..

Those witty acts on honeymoon,
wooing the better-half under full moon..

The loans n insurance policies,
those provident fund and no holidays..

Hearing the good news..from wife,
the 9 months seeming to be whole life..
}
else
{
this part is under construction,so you are requested to focus on the if part only.
}
Good Day!

contemptuous demeanour

My last post was a terrible disaster..i fumbled..bumbled..n i mucked up with my post..but i am overwhelmed with the comments i received despite of such blunders.
Thank you all for your support..n i will try to improve,as there are some well wishers who always guide me n point out the mistakes i commit,so that i could rectify them in future..love u all..
moving on..
About a week ago i came across one of the various turpitude of modern society,an incident a highly disgraceful one..
As i was entering a food joint with a friend of mine,we discovered that a bunch of guys being dragged out by the security guards..on inquiring about the incident we found out that those guys (dressed neatly and seemed to belong from a good family) were caught taking pics of girls present there n were passing lewd comments..
when a couple raised an objection to it the security guards came into action..n those reprobates were kicked out.
Often,girls are considered to be a soft target..tender,delicate,sophisticated and sensitive are some far-famed words to describe the fairer sex..but do not misconstrue us,with such predefined words because when time demands we can even be bold,strong,audacious and assertive..
Just because of few such creatures the whole of the male community is doubted n looked down on by girls..it becomes harder for us to trust the same..
The degree of obscenity sometimes exceeds the limit,quite expected from the illiterates..but when attempted by guys hailing from a literate background..it seems unbelievable!
God has created two species in human kind..so they both have liberty to access n lead their life their way,but the fairer sex can not do so because time n again they are targeted by such indecent acts..
I have come across few girls who lock themselves up in their abode,because they are afraid of such incidents..n they are preoccupied with notions that the same would happen to them,yes it can happen to them or to any1..but shutting yourself is not the option..this may lead such creatures to sit on your head n will motivate them to go ahead n continue there obscenity..if u really want to teach them a lesson then move out of your shadow n show them that you r not weak..u have the courage to face them n give them the desired answer as and when required..
"Courage is not the absence of fear. It is going forward with the face of fear."
Washing girls foot in navaratra,n making them an object of worship is not what is needed..i am not against these rituals,but what i feel is Women need to be respected,and guys who don't respect women,are like cold blooded animals..
You may find a group of guys hanging around in pubs,restaurants at late night..but if u find a girl she would be accompanied by her guy,family,or in group along with her male counterparts..u will rarely find a group of girls hanging out so late,reason there are drunkards and lustful eyes all over looking for their prey,peeping from behind the poles,in the corridors,on the streets,on bikes or maybe in luxurious cars..
No one can be there to escort u all the time..its u who has to protect yourself,from the devils and from the evils.
so don't hide from such incidents..if it happened to a girl next to u it can happen to u too..Preparing yourself is better than repenting later..
I wish this world could be a safer place to live so that a mother sitting miles away from her daughter does not have to fear for her daughter to return back from work safely..
I am not of an anti-male opinion..because i know all the guys are not the same,some are better,some are good,and some are the best..
but the leftover are "awful"..so,not only girls but even guys need to beware of such awful creatures because they are not only ruining us but they are also ruining your whole community..
"Life on the planet is born of woman".so,respect them n give them there due credit.

unwanted child

You are the biggest looser,just good for nothing,someone shouted at the top of his/her voice,she turned around in an enigma coz there was no one else in the room except her,then who could it be..she heard the same voice once again n this time she made no mistake in realizing that it was the voice of her inner conscience..
She sat by the window looking at the sky..
The moon was high,n stars were scattered all ovr the sky..
She reminisced her past..to find out where did she go wrong..or was she herself the soul reason behind her failures..
When her presence was felt in her mother’s womb,
Mother went to the doc to get the blooming bud aborted,as she was already blessed with three bright sons..and one more child in this exorbitantly priced environment would have proved to be a burden on her happy family..little did she know that it was a boy or a girl..
But destiny plays its game,docs denied for nipping the bud as it was too late..
Father was desperate for a daughter,n his wish was granted by the arrival of a daughter..“three sons brighter than sun,n a daughter prettier than moon,oh my love,how to tell u what you have given me”
No one knew what the future had in store for this little princess..the brothers were blossoming n spreading diverse fragrance,which was a sigh of delight for her..but what bout her?? despite being loved by everyone she knew the fact that she was not as good as her brothers in any respect......but its rightly said , where the foundation is unstable there is always a danger for the building to collapse.. but was it her fault??she was not the founder of her own self..wen she was young..she was like a wet clay..which could be molded in any form..bt the mold chosen for her ws deformed..
she was unable to explain it to the whole world that all are not the same… so she secluded herself from others..she was invisible coz no one ever wanted to see her,she was different,different from the rest,so they ignored her..she saw them laugh she saw them cry but she was never a part of them..coz she didn’t met their stature,she too cried,cried in dark,and in falls where no one cud see her…
every time she tried to come up..she was overpowered,and humiliated..she was crawling,crawling at her own pace..n every time she fell she had to start it from scratch..
she hated the sigh of sympathy n pity for her in others eyes..she wanted to break free n shout,shout as much as possible but she couldn’t do so..becoz she was living in a respectable society..
she stood all alone with stretched arms wanting others to accept her..to accept her as she is..
she knew she have to resurrect herself..she cant let her failures overshadow her existence..the best way she found to do so was, to stop expecting from herself..coz expectations hurts.She was determined to be her own creator now..so wat if thousands of failures come her way..she had the courage to face it with humility..
she still sat by the window looking at the sky,
the cool breeze brushed of her cheeks letting her hairs to fly..
a drop of tear rolled down her eyes,saying that her past is over..
and this time she saw the new horizon,spreading its hue all over..

friend

Whether the day is good or bad..
Whether im feeling hapy or sad,
You magnify my happiness,
When I am feeling glad;
You help to bring back the smile,
Whenever I am feeling sad.
You act as a canopy,
From life’s frequent storm;
Like a comfortable blanket,
You keep me cozy, safe and warm.
You’re a light in the window,
When everything’s grey;
You’re a trip to the circus,
A picnic in the day.
Like a bright, sunny summer,
You are joy without end;
You are precious to me,
And I am happy to have u as a friend
You are a pleasure in my life,
I hope that you can see;
How meaningful your friendship is,
You’re a total joy to me.

This post is dedicated to all the amazing friends I have in my life..n to all my blogger friends..
Keep smiling! and
Thanx for being there..

spirit of love(a short n sweet love story)

They met,they talked,and they became frenz,
They fought,they sought,and they became good frenz…
Sooner they realized that they have stolen each others heart,
And this refreshing feeling lead them to a new start..
She then flew to a far off place,
But their love and warmth couldn’t be replaced..
They dedicated songs to each-other,
And their love blossomed with new fragrance of each passing weather..
Despite of not meeting for so long,
Still their bond became even strong..
So was the serenity of their love,
Just like the purity of a Dove..
All of a sudden,something went devastatingly wrong,
Her heart was stale,and his heart-ached like a prick of a thorn..
Later they realized,that it was no ones fault,
But unfortunately their relationship had to come to a halt..
But unlike others they didn’t blame,
Instead they tried to give it a new name..
If not beloved and best frenz,atleast they were good frenz now,
And they managed to share the same care and respect somehow..
Now they don’t talk quite often,
But whenever they do,they make sure that their souls have soften..
They pray for each others good future,
And hope that the other one always nurture..
The respect won’t fade away like the light of the day,
Coz they still love each other,but in somewhat a different way..
So wat,if now they can't live together,
They’ll always cherish the memories forever..

The first step towards love is friendship..but in case if that relationship doesn’t work why cant that friendship be the last step??
Well!!this year is about to get over..and im very happy..will welcome the coming year with great zest..
Wishing u all a very peaceful,happy,prosperous 2009..
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

keep on the jingoism(part-II)

I knw its christmas today n I shud be talking something subtle..bt im sorry..this post is a continuation of the last one..
its almost been a month since those attacks shook the nation..this post is not about attacks..bt smething equally important
A house of a lawyer attacked by few unknown miscreants this is a third time an advocate willing to represent kasab has been targeted…the same kasab who took hundreds of life.. and these are the same lawyers who were criticizing him 4 such a dreadful act a week ago..n nw they are ready to lead his case..tagging it as their “professionalism”..
Kasab isn’t a person who needs to be represented by anybody..terrorists should be denounced universally..this is what is required..I dnt understand is any hearing required in such a state where whole nation doesn’t even have doubt of his insanity..

law states that we are not in war with Pakistan so we cannot detain kasab 4 more than 2 months..n lack of a defence lawyer will delay kasab’s trial..
I wonder if the gvt. didn’t find a defence lawyer what would it do..wud it set kasab free??jus coz law states that!
These laws are for whose benefit??its 4 us right..
i dn't know why such an unlawful act is being judged under law..
The rules and laws that are foundation of any civilized society are never more tested than when faced with barbaric criminal acts..serial killers n kidnappers victimize individuals,they are limited in scope..but a terror attack like 26/11 assaults all of us,the entire community..
Terror isn’t a civilized act..

Laws which override citizens right are often misused and tend to do more harm than good..its time for us to think..n enforce new anti-terror laws..if law is the only option left to deal with these terrorists..
India has been acting with lot of maturity since past many years..bt hasn’t been paid off for its genuinity..so,outsiders misinterpret it as our weakness..i dnt knw why we are acting so sweetly with these terrorist..i may sound kiddish bt i strongly believe that kasab should be hanged till death aftr extracting all the information possible from him..i knw its gonna take very long to come to a conclusion..but the sooner we decide the better it is..or else we wud be witnessing another IC-814..
laws are made by a country 4 the countries own benefit..so,let it do so..
wat wud u say shud we grant kasab with a defence lawyer??

At last I wud like to wish u all merry Christmas..
In day-time..the sun-shines..so may ur all wishes come true..
In night when the moon-lights so may god bless u..
N if rain-falls..so let it fall n so shall it carry all ur problems away from u!
Merry Christmas..
Amen..

keep on the jingoism..

Yes my xams are over and im back,I should be enjoing,having fun..bt how?how, can I with an overburdened heart..i knw the reaction is a bit late but its never late when it comes to patriotism..yes im talking about 26/11..despite of my xams I was hooked up to my television set for those 60 hrs..i guess any chauvinist would do the same..a lot has been said and written about these attacks..but wats the outcome..we are back from where we started..just a handful of protests against these parasitic politicians,few peace rallies..is it enough to heal a broken heart..rather a broken nation?the same old blame game,a couple of resignations,is it wat is required??

A wedding card stating khusbo “weds” malayesh..wedding scheduled for 6th December..every1 cordially invited to bless the newly wed..but did this happen..noo..the guy(an iit graduate) was one of the victims at taj..i can feel the pain of that girl,her dreams are shattered..and in such a way that no one can rebuild it..i heard the sound of bands,trumpet,shehnaai on 6thdecember..near my house..but my heart ached..ached at those pinching sounds..would have been melodious for some..

A 2yrs old child moochee..was suppose to celebrate his b’day smwhere in mid of December with his parents who were planning for his bright future..will he “celebrate” it?noo..cause his parents future has been distorted..just a fraction of seconds back he was lying in his fathers lap safe n secure and later he stood all alone..i wonder will he ever come to know the meaning of the word “ma”….“pa”
Terrorism has given rise to hundreds of tragic stories..God forbid,but it will keep on adding until a stringent action is enforced..
I read a banner smwhere stating.. “Nation of lions,lead by dogs” I would like to add to it a “nation of sleeping lions,lead by dogs..” anyhow sleeping lions are better than barking dogs..but when,when are these lions gonna wake..if not nw then when?We are the victims as well as culprits..becoz time n again we are letting it happen..

Gandhiji once said if sm1 slaps u on one cheek give him the othr one..bt he never specified if sm1 slaps on the othr as well what should u do…coz its understood that therz always a tolerance limit..how many more slaps are we gonna stick on our face..parliament attack,mumbai local attack,delhi attacks,jaipur attacks the list is endless but when are we gonna react that’s not decided as yet..

The reason for anger and anguish is pertinent..bt im afraid that with time,we the timid people of this country would soon forget about the same..its just another topic of debate in the parliament for these vampire politicians..our politicians have proved themselves enough, what more do we expect!!thats the reason im urging the common man..and not the politicians..
I consider dying in a war is better than dying for no reason..and surrendering oneself in front of a few insane.inhuman,vicious creatures..(they don't even deserve to be called as humans..)is just like giving up ur moral...

If ur in your skin and flesh with ur heart intact..you are fortunate enough to survive,coz anyday could be your last day....as a nation we need not take inspiration from any othr country..coz we are capable enough to design our own fortune..and differentiate wats right and wrong..wat we need is to get rid of few foolish politicians.. and wind up these deadly acts of terror demonstrating blood sheds all over..
I wonder what should be the next step and when??Its time to react to this jingoism befre it dies out..because thrz no othr option left..
"We do not create terrorism by fighting the terrorists. We invite terrorism by ignoring them."

Going on date with exams..

Those folding the corners of the book for further reference,
Preparing notes of only the most importatnt questions,
Going to the professor for shortlisting the important topics(or say the sure short questions which will definetly turn up in xams),
Last moment Completion of the practical file,
Cramming the whole stuff,skipping the meals in order to catch up with the syllabus..
Dark circles under eyes,coz of dearth of sleep..
Long ,late night calls discussing problems..leading to a new problem,
Opening the book of software testing,but thinking about MIS and the other subjects left untouched,
Going to temples for blessings,those yogurt n sugar..
Always thinking about the last day of the xams..Planning movies after xams..
Not receiving calls,messages from bf n old frenz..
Those combined studies,heated topic of debates(ending nowhere),
Proving ur point however,being it pointless..
Those healthy competitions..turning into hair pulling fights..
Palpitation as u approach the examination hall..
Sweat on forehead even in extreme winters..
Murmuring prayer before distribution of the question papers..
A jiff of smile after reading a question in the question paper..coz u knw the answer..
Feeling ‘j’ as ur fren asks for a supplementary sheet..before you..
Those 2 weeks of xams,seeming to be 2 long years..
Discussing the paper with frenz, Cursing urself for not answering a question u knew..
Waiting for the results(best phase),fake rumours of results being out,setting u ablaze..
World famous statement..”could have got more”even after getting distinction..in many papers…
N then back to the same old studies….

dasvidaniya

Russian word means "goodbye" in English,"au-revoir" in French,"alvida" in urdu and "phir milenge" in hindi…
A movie named dasvidaniya is soon to be released…No no this post has nothing to do with movies..its just the word which caught my attention…the first time I heard this word was in the movie Mera Naam Joker remember…the r.k.banner film..
There are times in your life when you have to say goodbye to your near and dear ones. Be it willingly or unwillingly, saying goodbye is one of the most difficult things in life. A short,sweet,effortless word but with lot of emotions in it..

>A happy goodbye- is when you leave your friend..with a promise that u’ll meet again..but in a diffrnt phase of life.."Don't be dismayed at good-byes. A farewell is necessary before you can meet again. And meeting again after a moment or lifetime is certain for those who are friends."

>A blend of both happy n sad goodbye-when u leave your parents for the first time..happy in the sense that u ooze out with lot of excitement,energy as you are going to enter the new world..governed by u..n sad becoz u’ll be parting with ur loving family…“A good-bye is never painful unless you’re never going to say hello again.”


>Goodbye to ur lover-coz he hurt you,dumped you,cheated you,or coz he lied to you..no reasons are enough to describe this sentiment..“Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened.”

>Goodbye on a daughters wedding-wishing her to have a splendid n prosperous future..those tears says it all..

>A simple goodbye-not involving any reasons ..itz just u feel like n you say it..
goodbyes are not only meant to bid adieu it involves lot of care,warmth,affection
“Saying goodbye doesn't mean anything. It's the time we spent together that matters, not how we left it.”

"We will surely meet again,before the earth dies
When we are least expecting it,
We will surely meet again,before the earth dies
One day in some far off place
My friend i will recognize your face ,I wont say goodbye.
That will be a moment of joy, I’ll always hold by my side
For we will surely meet again,before the earth dies."

these messy shoe laces

I love wearing shoes with jeans n trousers..its just sooo comfortable..okay we are not hear to discuss bout the comfort level of slip–ons..
There is a huge problem which I face while wearing shoes.Every now n then one can find me sitting on bench or steps struggling with my shoe laces..its not that I dnt knw how to tie a lace..but lately I discovered that my way of tying them was wrong..
Every hour someone or the other use to point out at my shoes asking me to tie those fluttering laces…I would then handover my helmet to my frenz n ask them to wait 4 a while(i must say they are very patient) so that I could end up with my laces again…my frenz are use to,with this habit of mine,as it more or less is becoming a part of my life...thinking positively,it isn't a bad back exercise,isn't it??ahh.. but enough of this back exercise..and to my ridicule
no one ever came forward to tell me what was wrong with my laces..
Then an angel in disguise(my mumma)helped me out.."Mother understands what a child does not say."a few days back I was sitting n tying the lace of my shoes, she was observing it very carefully,with a mischievous smile on her face..wen I got over with it..she gazed at me,i dnt know what was those looks for but they surely meant,"is this the way to tie a knot of a lace.." She then sat beside me and taught me step by step the right way to tie a knot.(of lace offcourse..)Precisely she tied it herself for me..n believe me that whole day the knot was as it is..it was at its place for bout 7 long hours..it was amazing..atleast for me it was a miracle..this is the reason why i regard my ma as an epitome of feminism...
"Some are kissing mothers and some are scolding mothers, but they love just the same; and most mothers kiss and scold together."
We try to do certain things with perfection..but a touch of our parents fulfils the lacking finesse.
Since im a slow learner...I have yet not learned her way of tying knot of a lace....bt very soon I will..
She even advised me,saying that if u buy shoes next time,buy one without lace as there are multiple range available in the market..
But tell me one thing,have i gone for an unlaced shoe before,had I ever been able to learn this basic lesson of my life..
I know i am poor at tying knots(of lace)..but will surely learn it soon..

who cares..!!

A conversation between a boyfriend(bf) and girlfriend(gf) which led to a catastrophe.
Boy:Where have u been since last 15 dayz??
Girl:Hey forget tat,i have a fren who wanna see u??
Boy:Sure,I wud love to meet her.
Girl:But there is a problem..she met with an accident and was hurt pretty badly,has lost a leg..i was taking care of her since last few days..but now I have to go out for a month due to some work.i want u to come here and take care of her as I did..just for 1 month...
Boy:Im sorry to hear that honey,but may be we can find a nurse for her assistance.
Girl:No,I want u to look after her..
Boy:U dnt knw wat ur asking..someone with such a handicap wud be a terrible burden on me..i have my own life to live..i have my workload..n u want me to take care of that person for one whole month..tats 2 much..

The girl hung up her phone.the boy heard nothing from her..a few days later,he received a call from a hospital..stating that his girlfriend had died.the police believed it was suicide..the grief sticken boy rushed to the hospital.he recognized her,but to his horror he also discovered something he didn’t know.
His gf had only one leg...
we don't like people who inconvenience us or make us feel uncomfortable,they usually belong to the rejected section of the society. We would rather stay away from people who aren't as healthy, beautiful, or smart as we are.
But thankfully, there are few people who won't treat them that way. Someone who loves them with an unconditional love that welcomes them into the forever family, and i salute such people..

dare to dream..

“Some people live to dream,some dream to live”.
Defining dream is a tough job…
Just take a moment and think back to a time when you were playing and at the same time you were also living a dream. You may have been four, five, six, seven or even eight years old longing for an expensive toy bike..or your favourite Barbie dolls..
were these all dreams,or just fantasies and imaginations..but lemme tell u guys n gals the first step in dreaming is imagination..
So,What happened???
Why did you stop Dreaming???
One’s life is full of dreams some meaningless,but some with lot of connotations.
Those childhood dreams were just a short term dream…now u wud say that wat does this short term and long term dream complies
At a point in life you dream of getting a good job..but when you actually get one..that dream surpasses..and then you move on to your next dream.Getting married to ur beloved is one of your key dreams u tend to do anything,go against any1,in order to grow old with your loved one..and luckily u get her in ur life..bt wat aftr that.. does life ends there?i guess no..these are all short term dreams..
a long term dream is,where you wanna see urself after a certain stage in life..in accomplishing this long term dream you unknowingly fulfil many short term dreams…just close your eyes for 3 minutes and imagine what you wanna be at an age of 50,60yrs then u’ll come to knw what u actually want from life..
“Dreams don't have to come true at age 20, 30, or 40; they often occur long past when you thought possible.”
Do you still long for a bike when you grow up..or when you actually have one??or do you ever stop in front of a toy store to have a glance of your favourite Barbie doll. ?I guess some of you may answer this question with a resounding yes.. Well with a *smile I commend you for nurturing that very special side of you that allows you to dream. And I commend you for nurturing the child within.
But It's a shame as we grow in years and experience we also become more serious about life and through some bad experiences we become sophisticated and realistic.
I too have a dream,a bit unusual one,just a few people are aware of it..and guess what their reaction was..a big,handsome "WHATTT!!RU SURE"??I don’t knw whether I’ll be able to accomplish it bt I’ll work towards it..
The Thing is we want a speedy result to our dream, when we do this, we lose the ability to create, to fantasize and explore We grow up and leave behind the child within. It takes about 1000 neurons to paln a dream..so,dnt be so greedy dear give ur dream ample time to blossom..
We need to believe in our dreams. Just imagine for a moment if right now you could recapture all of those *Magic Moments(dream) and live them as if you were really there right now. Remember how you were feeling and what you were seeing and hearing. The journey to the dream may not be smooth,but realizing that u actually achieved it is "victory"..what else can you ask for..
Life doesn't have to be so serious and we don't really need to be so realistic, nor do we have to meet the expectations of others in terms of behavior n dreams.its our dream n living our dream is upto us.. So,next time you see a doll or a bike..just stop there and realize that u 2 can dare to dream..
“Cherish your visions and your dreams, as they are the children of your soul; the blueprints of your ultimate achievements.Don't let today's disappointments cast a shadow on tomorrow's dream”

the real me

It may seem as if I am carefree and strong,
Going through life as if nothing is wrong.
But no one has ever seen the real me,
They only know what I let them believe.
Most often my smiles are real and sincere,
Other times they help to hide my secret fears.
I carefully created a clever mask of illusion,
I wear it now to hide my pain and confusion.
So never is a tear seen falling from my eye,
I have learned to hold it all silently inside.
Quite often I want to just let go and weep,
But the pain is very intense and too deep.
I yearn to belong, to be one of the crowd.
To be able to speak of my dreams out loud.
Wanting so very much to be accepted,
Yet fearing the possibility of being rejected.
I need someone to discern the real me,
And not hold in contempt what they will see.
The weaknesses and flaws I try so hard to hide,
Are all part of the real me I keep hidden inside.

u go through many interesting articles n poem bt as time passes u tend to forget them,this is one amongst few which i wud always like to keep intact..becoz this is the 'the real me'..

venom

Feeling a lot relaxed this weekend,since I got ovr wid the much hyped presentation which went off pretty well,n secondly an unexpetd call frm a vry old frn was a pleasant surprise..actually I had 2 topics 4 this post..so wil go wid d previous one…since I need to give a deep thought to the othr one which I discovrd lately n it screwed my head..
This week as always had smthng in its kit which I had heard of several time, but didn’t ever faced..
When ur in an urgency,you have to bear with everything..as im a student of university and my bro was in an urgent need of his graduation degree..which he completed a couple of yrs back..so,rightly he chose me to do dis job 4 him..It was a hell of a experience..being a govt org. what else can u expect from it…yes im talking about corruption..
“Corruption is a tree, whose branches are Of an immeasurable length: they spread Ev'rywhere; and the dew that drops from thence Hath infected some chairs and stools of authority”
It is a disease which is slowly and gradually poisoning our country..I had to bribe(in my words “bribe”,”fees” in his,which he kept in his pocket) that clerk to get my job done,though it wasn’t a big amount but a bribe is a bribe..if I wudn’t have done it,it wud have taken weeks to crack that nut,n wud have affected sm1’s career..
Many-a-times you wud have faced similar situation but may be with other terms like commission,donation,chai-pani,apki shraddha etc.
We blame the system for everything wrong happening around us,but smeway or the other we are a part of it..we are the one who can change it..but we need to start from the grass root level..
There are so many political parties why cant we youth have a party,comprising of literate guys n gals below 40 yrs..n with a retirement agelimit..im saying below 40yrs coz..elder politicians though being experienced are useless..(mind u exceptions are always there)..
There are basically 2 types of politics 1)political,2)developmental..the older lot focuses on the 1st one..but im sure the younger lot wud focus on the latter.
“The military don't start wars. Politicians start wars.”
It is said that we dream of India becoming super power by 2020..but do you think that these uncivilized politicians,who are here just to pay off their old scores can make it possible?? youth has the power to dream with an ability to fulfil it..
If youths are there in evry fields then why not polotics??this applies to me too..why is it that aftr pursuing our due education we look for a lavish career,a well settled life,a happening lifestyle,n not polotics??
A 100 of youth together can make a difference but the thing is we need to unite..
Im not a chauvinist,but this is what I feel. “The most heroic word in all languages is revolution.”
I know this post wud sound a bit weird bt just give it a thought..

immortal love

This post is dedicated to my grandpa who is leaving 2mrw for my cousins home,and to my grandma who is no more in this materilistic world.
It's been 7 months since grandpa has been wid us in our abode..when he came he was not alone..he was accompanied by dadi my grandma..these 7 months was like an emotional melodrama for him consisting of both positive and negative aspect..positive in the sense..i have seen a satisfaction on his face,on the transfer of my uncle back to the hometown,n also the blithe when my brother was offered a dignified job,to share all these happinez my grandma was there with him..But 2day wen he is leaving our house she is no more,neither with him nor with us..his major dismay is that till now wherever he went,he was accompanied by her..but this is for the first time he has to go alone..
Grandpa is in his late 80’s..and its just been 4 n a half months since grandma left us..since then he has not been living his life he is just trying to “pass” it..many a times I have seen him analyzing,observing grandma’s antiques and utilities so as to be close to her..not even a single day when he does not reminisces her..
he has been an idol of patience,courage,strength and will always be..but I have seen him craving for grandma..
What to say about my grandma..she was a highly intellectual lady..im nt sayin this coz she was my grandma..any person in her close vicinity would say the same.Even in those times when their was dearth of facilities,n women were considered underdogs and were imposed with lot of restrictions ,she proved her metal by overcoming all those restrictions..only for good upbringing of her children..as any mother would have done..
I dnt knw whether she was able to achieve what she actually desired..but then sometimes you have to sacrifice your dreams for the sake of others.Im saying this coz of her writings or call it an autobiography..where she poured her heart out.she had a gr8 command over hindi as well as English...i must say despite being so independent in her thoughts she was completely devoted towards her family..This is evident from the bond each family member share ..this was what she wanted.she always wished to see all of us together..and we very much are.
Both my grandma and grandpa’s nature was totally diverse,quite natural,since this is the soul behind a successful relationship. "Love is not about finding the right person, but creating a right relationship. It's not about how much love you have in the beginning but how much love you build till the end." if grandma loved to be social then grandpa was a loner.they had entirely different food tastes.
Grandpa u always use to say that I have offered lot of servings to grandma during her last days,but trust me it was not offered to earn any praise,I would have considered it fruitful if grandma would have recovered,I was just trying to increase the gap between her life and death..so that she could stay with us for a longer time,but then lets face the veracity it was an incurable disease.

What to say grandpa,I will really miss those evening walks of about 15-20mins which we had after dinner,each walk taught me a new lesson,and gave a new dimension to my life.you are an institution,as was your betterhalf.
I know we all get occupied in our day to day activities and somewhere,somehow we have started living with it..but I can completely understand your grief..she meant the whole world to you..and when a part of you leaves you at this stage of life its really hard to condone.. “There is no grief like the grief that does not speak.”
Dadi this is for you I know u are up above in the sky and showering your blessings upon us..but why did you go? “Time goes by, life goes on, and all I can think of is why you're gone."
Grandpa I am glad that we are in the same city,will definetly catch up on weekends..but I would just say that “Seeing your partners death as the end of life is like seeing the horizon as the end of the ocean.”wherever she would be lets wish that her soul rest in peace..
Isn’t love immortal??
See u grandpa
Miss u grandma.(chitthi na koi sandes jaane vo kaunsa des jahan tum chale gaye)

some questions unanswered

"once you start to question your life you get to a higher level of awareness,its like turning the light on--voila you see you have choices and choices are sacred"
what if??after someone's demise you come to know that he loved you like anything..n you too had a liking for him.
what if??when you possess a dream,with full determination,but are unable to accomplish it.
what if??when you have champions all around,but you know that you are not the one.
what if??when you are constantly not allowed to rise up from your past failures,even after putting in a lot of hardwork .
what if??when you are let down by your failures,even when you try to ignore them.
what if??when you don't want to leave your makers,just because of your career.
what if??when you are not credited,for the credit you deserve.
what if??when you are assessed according to others performance.
what if??when you really care but are unable to express.
what if??when your only desire to see your makers proud of you,is not fulfiled.
what if..??many more..but with no answer..
we learn more by looking for the answer to a question and not finding it,than we do from learning the answer itself.

transition

feeling a bit low since yesterday..may be a person very dear to me said something facetious,with not even a mere intention of hurting me...but i couldn't help it,it nipped my heart..then i scrutinize that what am i upset with??with that person who didn't even know that he had hurt me..or with myself..i quickly reminiscent some scenes of my past..i found that
We are responsible for what we are today,and whatever we wish ourselves to be,we have the power to make ourslves.
If what we are now has been the result of our own past actions,it certainly follows that whatever we wish to be in future can be produced by our present actions;an individual is responsible for living his own life and "discovering himself" if he shifts to somebody else he fails to find out the meaning of his own existence,one can't blame others for his own failures.
Here i am back with same old zest for life.
"We are here for some special reason.Stop being a prisoner of your past.Become the architect of your future.

beauty does matter

"she did not draw your attention to how pretty she was,she didn't draw attention to anything bout her.this was her beauty"
I recall an incident..a couple of days back i was hanging around with a bunch of old frenz at a food outlet..sooner we realized a damn good looking young lass sitting beside us..all guys went oh la la..over her looks..and i can bet that each and every individual was mesmerized by her looks..one can call her pretty but was she really beautiful?... decide after reading this..
All of a sudden she stood up and went to the counter with full agitation..and denied to pay the bill reason being "the coffee served was tasteless" this all lead to a fracas...it hardly took us a minute to realize that how catankerous and what a dolt she was...so can she be called beautiful just coz of looks??..i guess not
Coz beauty is not superficial..it lies within(heart).Inner beauty describes the positive aspect of something which is not physically observable.
It's your elegance,behavior,intelligence,honesty what counts..its not about your behaviour towards an elite persona its about how you acknowledge a person of low stature than yours..
"if you get simple beauty and nothing else,you get the best thing god invents"..i am bleesed to have plenty of beautiful heart and soul around me..but i can still see many person need to embellish their heart..so do i

are you exclusive??

diffidence is something that lowers the scale of life when life can happen more beautifully.over-confident people are invariably tyrant.what we need is consciousness..whenever i face,any kind of situation or people,the moment i sit,i just look at them,and i don't even have to think i just see them as a part of myself,i speak to them as i speak to myself.to speak to yourself you don't need confidence the need only arises when you have to talk to someone else.It is said that "hesitation is the worst of sins".but "don't hesitate" does not mean to jump into every pit that you see.you are intelligent enough to decide and choose in a moment whether you need to do something or not.
you try to be exclusive..but trying to be special is the worst disease,because once you get this disease,their is no salvation.wherever you go you have to do something stupid to prove that your special.if you are so exclusive,why are you inhaling what i exhale?try to breathe separately and see you will be dead.so why do you always want to be exclusive,live the way life is,just ordinary,.it is ordinary but it is magnificient.